A letter to my daughter

"...this could be the best day of my life
I've been dreaming night and day about the fun we'll have"

Abrielle,

I meant to do this for your 6 month "birthday" but it seems as though time has sped up and is flying by us. At this point I have come to terms with the fact that your babyhood will be over before I know it, so I am now just trying to cherish every moment. You turned 7 months yesterday and I am still in disbelief that you could possibly be that old.  You are now closer to a toddler than you are to a baby. 

Even after 7 months, just last night after I went in to peek on you (yes, your father and I both still do that) before I went to bed, I was closing your door with a big goofy smile on my face, thinking the thought that crosses my mind and also my lips several times a day:

"how did I get so lucky?"

I'll never know the answer to that question, and that is OK with me.  You are such a good and joyful baby and it is such a blessing to be around you everyday.  You are so generous with your smiles and I defy anyone not to smile back at you. 

There are so many things I love about you and doing with you.  I have written several times about how I love our mornings together, just as we are spending right now. I love how when I feed you and you are sleepy you doze off and snuggle in to me, as though you could never feel more loved, comforted or safe.  I often gaze down at those cherubic little lips softly parted and your long lashes resting on your cheeks and feel a surge of warmth inside me.



I love our routine after you get up from a nap of going and opening the blinds to see if it is a nice day.  I love how you now part the curtains in anticipation of this and gaze upon our backyard. 

I love how you are now mugging for the camera, although it is making it hard to get some more candid moments, such as the one above, on film. 



I love your big sloppy kisses, and how you use both of your tiny hands to bring our faces closer together.  I love how you are constantly exploring everyone's faces with your hands as though you are committing the details to memory.



I love how curious you are.  You are constantly launching your little body or doing some sort of gymnastics when something catches your eye.  One of my favourites is when I pull you into bed on the weekends and you try to climb over me to get to your father, who you just somehow know is there.

I love how when you are happy, which is the majority of the time, you move and squeal and laugh as though there is too much happiness in your body for you to contain. 

I love how independent you are.  God help the person who tries to feed you when you want to do it yourself.  Although it frightens me, I love how sometimes you just wont sit still and need to walk with us holding your hands.  It's as though you are far to busy to just sit and enjoy the company.

I love how we cuddle and read books, and often you will look up at me as I read with an expression that seems to say "and then what happened?".

I love watching you with your cousins, especially Ryann, because she has something special that brings the most smiles and giggles out of you.



I love kissing you.  To date, you have probably received 7 million kisses from me, and I tell you every day that I am going to keep kissing you until the day I die.

I love how you made my husband a father.  I thought that I couldn't love your Dada anymore before you were born, but I was wrong. I get tears in my eyes every day watching you too goofs together.  Abby honey, you have no idea what it is like to see a big bear of a man be so connected with such a tiny little body.  You adore your father to the point that sometimes I get momentarily jealous.  I often get texts from your Dad that say something simple like "I just love her so much!".  I know that you are on his mind all of the time.



I love how you love hockey.  Now, some might argue it is just the fast movement and bright colors, but you seem to have a genuine appreciation for it.  Hockey has played a very big role in your father and I's relationship and the fact that we can share this with you is beyond awesome.  You attended most of Oilfield Anything's games this year with me and Kaella, Cheyenne and Carman, and as you grew older you transitioned from sleeping through them to excitedly waving your blanket as they played.  We even got a picture of you and your Daddy on ice.



Every day that passes, I think to myself "this is it, I couldn't possibly get any happier than this.  I couldn't love you more than this" yet every day I prove myself wrong.  Every day that I get to spend with you somehow my heart just grows a little more and I fill that spot with more love.

I could go on forever about how much I love you, my little bumblebee, but I will never be able to fully express how I feel.  You have made a mark on my heart and changed me forever, and I can't imagine a life without you.  You have made everything in my life better and I am so, so, SO lucky to be your mama.